“Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.” -Tennessee Williams

I am incredibly lucky. I have had the same amazing best friend since I was in grade 8. I spent the afternoon with her today and I realized that the very best part of our friendship is that she makes me feel that I am the best possible version of myself. I don't have to pretend to be cooler than I am, or smarter than I am or funnier than I am...when I am with her I am the perfect amount of cool, smart, funny etc. I hope that I make her feel the same way.

In my life, this level of comfort and security has been something that I have found difficult to achieve with people outside of my family. My immediate family know pretty much ever facet of who I am and, they too, make me feel as if I am a perfect version of myself.

Someday I hope to find this quality in a mate...a man who makes me feel as if I am the perfect version of me. Who doesn't want to change where I came from, how I look, what I value or the things and people that I love. I do believe that the person you are with should challenge you to try new things and consider new ideas...but I don't want to feel as if I am a square peg trying to fit into a round hole just so I don't have to be alone.

And so...I continue to wait...

“If you blame others for your failures, do you credit them with your success?”

Blame: The state of being responsible for a fault or error; culpability.

Responsibility: Something for which one is responsible; a duty, obligation, or burden.

Not every workplace is ideal. Responsibilities are not always well defined therefore...sometimes things fall through the cracks. Tasks don't get done or they are done incorrectly - it happens, we're human. However, what bothers me the most is when no one takes ownership for their mistakes. When I say "ownership" I don't necessarily mean "oops, I messed up, I'm sorry" (although that is nice). What I mean is - seeing a problem -> looking for a solution -> putting the solution into practice. Often, instead of ownership, people just pass the buck...they don't want to make the tough decision or have the awkward conversation...instead they want to "think about it".

I know that I am new to the corporate world and it is easy for those on the "outside" to criticize. I admit that I don't have to concern myself with the bottom line, answer to the owners or reach a sales goal. I am only accountable for my small list of responsibilities however my pay scale and benefits reflect that level of responsibility. However, sadly, the people on the "outside", the people with that level of responsibility and corresponding pay scale, are the ones who have to deal with the day to day challenges which arise out of the indecisiveness.

In the end, I suppose it is just one of life's little frustrations.

“If there were no God, it would have been necessary to invent him.” -Voltaire

"I know that you don't believe in God or the power of prayer. And that's okay. To each his own. But you've go to believe in something. Something more than you can touch taste or see. Because life is too hard to go through it alone. Without something to hold onto and without something that's sacred."

A while back I had a discussion with a friend about religious beliefs. During our conversation this person revealed to me that they are an atheist and that really made me think. Atheism is a concept that I just can't wrap my brain around. I understand people believing different gods or multiple gods or "the universe" but I can't figure out how someone can go through life without believing in anything at all. Do these people believe that everything that happens to them everyday is a completely random occurrence with no rhyme or reason? I feel like too many awful and wonderful things happen every day for there not to be some sort of cosmic plan. However, to be fair, I have had of wonderful things in m life so perhaps that is why it is so easy for me to have faith in "the plan".

Although...perhaps if you believe in something less ethereal like you family and your friends you won't spend your life trying to appease your god or gods. Perhaps the atheists have it right and instead of focusing on trying to please the big guy in the sky we should focus on trying to please the old woman beside us on the bus or the young man bagging our groceries.

Personally, I think that I will always believe in the big guy in the sky and not just because of the blessings he has given me. I believe in him because in order to live my life I need to know that there is a blueprint, a master plan. To those that don't need that comfort and safety I give my kudos...I am not brave enough to go it alone.