"I love Valentine's Day. When you're a kid everyone gets a Valentine. It's like 'TO TIM, NICE PANTS, LOVE SCOTT'." - Mike Birbiglia

I have a confession to make.

Even though I'm single (and have been for 26 out of the past 27 Valentines days)...

I like Valentines day.

No, not the commercialized, forced affection part of Valentines day but I do appreciate any opportunity to give gifts, tell people you love them and make them smile. Perhaps the reason I can appreciate this 'holiday' (without being bitter) is because I don't believe that it should be limited to celebrating romantic love. I believe Valentines day can, just as easily, be used to celebrate love for your family or your friends either in addition too or instead of celebrating romantic love.

For as long as I can remember I would wake on on Valentines day to find a special treat from my parents. Sometimes it was chocolates, sometimes a special cookie, one year it was a heart shaped coin purse and every now and then it was just a card. Regardless of what the gift was, it was a reminder of love - my parents love for me as well as the possibility that love, true and romantic love, was out there somewhere.

So, here's hoping that Valentines day brought you some love - love from your family, your friends, your pets, your coworkers...whomever.

“Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.” -Tennessee Williams

I am incredibly lucky. I have had the same amazing best friend since I was in grade 8. I spent the afternoon with her today and I realized that the very best part of our friendship is that she makes me feel that I am the best possible version of myself. I don't have to pretend to be cooler than I am, or smarter than I am or funnier than I am...when I am with her I am the perfect amount of cool, smart, funny etc. I hope that I make her feel the same way.

In my life, this level of comfort and security has been something that I have found difficult to achieve with people outside of my family. My immediate family know pretty much ever facet of who I am and, they too, make me feel as if I am a perfect version of myself.

Someday I hope to find this quality in a mate...a man who makes me feel as if I am the perfect version of me. Who doesn't want to change where I came from, how I look, what I value or the things and people that I love. I do believe that the person you are with should challenge you to try new things and consider new ideas...but I don't want to feel as if I am a square peg trying to fit into a round hole just so I don't have to be alone.

And so...I continue to wait...

"Love is just a word until someone comes along and gives it meaning.”

I believe that you do not choose who you fall in love with.

I also believe that two consenting adults who are in love should be able to share their lives, forever, no matter their race, sex, religion or creed.


In July of 2005 Canada legalized same-sex marriage. Our country served as a haven for couples in love who were not able to be married in their own counties, state or cities. I am proud to live in a country that recognizes the rights of people regardless of their sexual orientation. People are people.


Today, Proposition 8 was overturned, legalizing same sex marriage in California...
in this I see progress, hope and, above all, love for our fellow man.


"God doesn't make mistakes. People are born how they are born. And I think people should be able to get married and love each other."

~Kristin Chenoweth

The most beautiful proposal ever...

http://www.bakerella.com/wedding-cake-pops/

....a love letter to no one...

http://www.aloveletterforyou.com/?page_id=198

“I can't go on anymore bad dates. I would rather be home alone than out with some guy who sells socks on the internet.”

So, as embarrassing as it is to admit this...I have signed up for an Internet dating site. No I will not tell you the name of the site so you can look up my profile and mock me. But, I will tell you that it has been an interesting experience.

I have only been on the site for one week and have had about 10 guys contact me. One of the guys seems pretty cool, one turned out to be a bit of a perv and most of them aren't really my type. However, I realized during this process that I am a bit pickier than I thought and I defiantly have a particular type. I love myself a dorky, awkward, skinny boy with dark rimmed glasses that loves movies, music, television and video games but he has to have a good sense of himself and a wicked sense of humour. I'm not into guys who loves sports, cars, working out, tight shirts, gold chains, beer or hunting. Oh, and I'm not really into the whole bald with a goatee look, I don't know why but most of the guys who have messaged me have that combo going on (I know that seems shallow but I've got to be honest). I don't want you to look like every other guy with a ball cap and an abercrombie t-shirt, I just want someone who is original and passionate about something.

I also had one thing reaffirmed for me....I don't like clingy/needy guys. I don't like a guy who puts it all out there right on the first date. I like a little mystery, a little chase, a bit of a hunt. As long as you're honest and straightforward once we get together, I don't mind a bit of a with-holding dance during the courtship. I don't need to be in constant communication with you at all times (as I said, I have a very full life) but a nice "I'm thinking about you" or "I saw this and it reminded me of you" text is nice. I like somethings to be left to the imagination...it keeps it interesting.

I also realized that, although I am lonely sometimes, I've been alone for a long time and I don't need a man in my life to be happy. I have a very full life with lots of friends, an amazing family, a new career on the horizon and interests that I don't want to give up so that I can appear more desirable to a man. We all have our 'desperate moments' but it's like shopping, I don't want to settle for something that doesn't fit properly just because I need something to wear.

"Do you believe in computer dating?"

"Only if the computers really love each other."

-Groucho Marx

"He's gonna marry me."

THE GUIDE TO BEING SO CHOICE

(aka How Sloane Peterson from Ferris Bueller’s Day Off Taught me how to be an Awesome Girlfriend.)

http://bonerparty.tumblr.com/post/162461458/condicondi-the-guide-to-being-so-choice-aka-how

P.S. Yes I know I hugely ripped this recommendation off of Gala Darling but it was TOO brilliant.

“Where words fail, music speaks.”

Thank you for giving me the gift of music and the knowledge that I possess a talent that is more important than I'll ever know.

Patricia Marlene Bohemier: April 9, 1946 – August 17th, 1999

"Ten years ago today, It seems like yesterday, God shone His light, He set your spirit free, Your unwavering courage, Your calming and gentle ways, The tomorrow’s you will never see, Your legacy was your faith, We cherish each and everyday, These memories we have of you."

"All women are flirts, but some are restrained by shyness, and others by sense."

Sitting by the pool today I observed a pair of teenagers flirting. Despite the fact that the girl seemed EXTREMELY annoying, it was entertaining to watch her attempt to woo this young man. In a pool, surrounded by various family members, she made awkward conversation and did not stray more than three feet from her 'beloved'. The young man also made his efforts by picking up the poor gal and throwing her into the pool...numerous times.

It was awkward and brave and inspirational.

Sometimes I wish I was still able to put myself out there like that but after being hurt, embaressed and humiliated so many times...*sigh* I applaud you, young lady.

And now for something completely different...

I am absolutley doing this at my wedding.

http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=4-94JhLEiN0

Things I Love...A through Zed (not Zee..Zed!)

A is for...the Ace of Cakes with my future husband, Duff Goldman. I don't care if he is Jewish. I would convert.

B is for...BETSEY JOHNSON!

C is for...Chandeliers, Canada, Cupcakes.

D is for...Disney World. C'mon now. What else would it be? (Although 'dogs' came a close second).

E is for...Erin, my best friend since forever!

F is for...family...my family is amazing.

G is for...gardening. When I was a kid I used to wake up early on Saturdays not to watch cartoons but to watch gardening shows. And I asked for a pond for my 13th birthday. I was a weird kid.

H is for...Harry Potter. All the books, all the movies, all the culture. Everything about it.

I is for...The I-75. It either means I am going to Disney World or I am coming home after a year of working there...both GREAT things!

J is for...Johnny Depp. He is handsome and brilliant and well spoken.

K is for...kissing. 'Nuff said.

L is for..."Lost". Best. Show. Ever.

M is for...music. Duh.

N is for...my Nana. Pretty much the most amazing person on the planet.

O is for...old journals. Reading your old journals is one of the most enlightening, embaressing, hilarious and frustrating thing in the world.

P is for...Port Dover. A beautiful town on the shores of Lake Erie.

Q is for...quiet time. Sometimes I really like to be alone and read a book and listen to some music. That is why I am so excited to be moving into my own one bedroom apartment in a month.

R is for...Roger, my bunny rabbit. Get it? Roger Rabbit?

S is for...Sara, my other best friend. Basically the most thoughtful person on the planet.

T is for...Tim Hortons. Especially after living in the United States for a year and not being able to get it!

U is for...underwear. More specifically cute underwear.

V is for...Victoria and Alberts. A very swanky restaurant in the Grand Floridian Resort at Disney World. Worth every single dollar of your $150.

W is for...The Weakerthans. My favorite band...ever.

X is for..."xoxo" at the end of all of my text messages, cards, letters and e-mails.

Y is for..."You've Got Mail"...it's a sappy romantic comedy but I love it.

Z is for...being back in a country where people pronounce this properly. It's Zed, not Zee, ZED!

"I don't like being single, no. I live this fantastic life, full of all these magical things, and at the end of the day all I want to do is pick up my phone and share it with someone. The other day I'd sold a million records in the U.S. and I didn't have anyone to tell. It was actually a really lonely moment."

-Katy Perry

"Your love glass is half full."

"Whats a perfect date?"

"You take someone to Applebys and buy them hot wings."

I must see this movie...it's called Paper Heart. You should see it too.

http://www.imdb.com/title/tt1331064/

"Waste everything except time. Time is your most valuable commodity."

I have always found it very difficult to balance groups of friends. I've had some pretty amazing experiences in my life (so far) and often some pretty amazing friends come out of those experiences. However, when you've moved on from one experience to the next and those friends come back...how do you deal with them? They're from a different time and place when you were a different person and perhaps that means that they are not the best fit any longer.

People you once loved fiercely seem mismatched to who you have become...the grown-up version of the girl that they shared an adventure with years ago. And what do you do when this happens? You have shared some very intense experiences with these people, you have been through joy and heart break with them, you have stood by them when they have been wronged and they have done the same for you...you're grateful...but unsure how to proceed. I am unsure how to proceed.

The best I can do is be grateful for the friendship we had and what we experienced together. I hope that somewhere down the line we will fit together again.

Until then, friend...until then.

"Why do they call it a crush? Because that's how you feel when they don't feel the same way?"

It blows my mind that an intelligent, seemingly mature and independant woman like myself cannot handle a simple 'crush'. Heck, I'm surprised I still get crushes. Isn't there a deadline for that sort of behaviour? A time in your life when you start having real, mature relationships instead of fixating on a person and obsessing about them for a few weeks before losing interest.

And why am I not capable of keeping these things to myself? For about a week I will keep the new feelings to myself, when the second week comes around I am just overflowing with affection that I have to tell one or two important people...after that...all hell breaks loose! I tell anyone who will listen....I use it as a CONVERSATION STARTER for God sakes!

What is wrong with me? Do I just really like the attention? Or do I think that if I put it out there into the 'universe' it might happen? Do I secretly hope that someone will tell the guy? So I don't have to? GAH! Is this why a normal, mature relationship eludes me? Because I still have the maturity of a 12 year old?

I need help. *sigh*

“Don’t settle for a relationship that won’t let you be yourself.”

"In any relationship in which two people become one, the end result is two half people."

I have never been in a serious relationship. Sometimes I wonder, when and if it happens, how I will be able to deal with it. Right now I cannot fathom how two people spend ALL of their time together. I like being alone and I have no idea how to share absolutley everything with another person. I am afraid that I have been independant for so long that I will never be able to depend on a man in a relationship.

"It is only when we no longer compulsively need someone that we can have a real relationship with them.”

When I hear girls talk about how they don't want work because their boyfriends give them money...it disgusts me. Don't you want to earn your own money? When couples have to do EVERYTHING together, down to the most mundane tasks it scares me because I don't know if I'm going to be able to do that without being totally annoyed by the other person.

"Don't smother each other. No one can grow in the shade."