"You are unrepeatable. There is a magic about you that is all your own..." ~D.M. Dellinger

"They say that every snowflake is different. If that were true, how
would the world go on? How could we ever get up off our knees? How could we
ever recover from the wonder of it?”
~Jeanette Winterson

Lately I have been struggling with the concept of 'individuality";
the idea that I am a unique human being who cannot be replicated.

All through our childhood we are told that we are different, unique and
special but, in the end, aren't we really just copying someone that came before
us? (Even as I write this I feel as if I am a cheap imitation of Carrie
Bradshaw).

What purpose is the “you're different”, “you're unique”, “you’re special” rhetoric designed to serve?

Could it possibly have been more detrimental than helpful?

When speaking with a friend the other day I shared a very private (and somewhat embarrassing) thought....I still think that I am going to grow up to 'be somebody'.

By ‘somebody’ I don't mean *just* a good citizen, employee, friend, girlfriend, wife, mother etc., to me those are all a given. What I mean is somebody famous, somebody known, somebody who will impact the lives of others on a large scale.

I am not particularly outstanding at anything

I don't have any unique physical features
I don’t have any special talents
…so what makes me think I deserve fame or recognition?

I partially attribute this feeling to how easy it seems to gain notoriety in this day and age via the internet. Shouldn’t I just be able to write a kitschy blog, film a funny video or post a beautiful picture and become instantly famous?
No? But that worked for:

A) Rebecca Black
B) The casts of the following shows:
1. Jersey Shore
2. The Real House Wives of Orange County
3. The Real House Wives of New Jersey
4. The Real House Wives of New York
5. The Bad Girls Club
6. Dog the Bounty Hunter
etc.

However, I can’t blame the internet completely for this identity crisis, as much as I might want to. So who/what else is to blame for endowing me with this feeling of entitlement? I attribute it to the “snowflake principle”, the teaching that we are all different, unique and special.

Now, please don’t get me wrong – I truly WANT to believe that I am different, unique and special. To be honest, regardless of this rather depressing missive, I think I am!

However, I think that this “snowflake principle” often sets up people for failure.

Why do I think I deserve a great job? Because I’m different, unique and special.
Why do I think I deserve a great home? Because I’m different, unique and special.
Why do I think I deserve a great boyfriend? Because I’m different, unique and special.

So – what is the solution/end game? Do I attempt to define myself with new interests and attributes to prove that I, in fact, AM different, unique and special? Take up hot air ballooning? Or duck wrangling? Learn π to the 1000th degree? Unfortunately I don’t know the answer. So, for now, I will continue to ust be myself and hope that there isn’t an imposter running around, trying to steal what is ‘owed’ to me.

“A moment lasts all of a second, but the memory lives on forever.” ~Unknown

What if you were able to remember every single moment of every single day of your entire life? What if it took you all of three seconds to recall what you had for lunch on May 16th, 1996? Or how many times you made a right turn on June 26th, 2005? Or, more importantly, every time someone said something hurtful about you - ever. Or how many times you had been embarrassed? Or how many times you had been sick? Or failed a test?

Would you ever venture out and take a risk? Would you put yourself out there in friendships or relationships? Would you try something new? Or would you be paralyzed by the memory of every single time you failed?

Your memories would be as fresh as if they happened minutes ago - does that mean the pain/pleasure/sadness/happiness would be as fresh as well?

Would the good memories balance out the bad?

Or would you just hold onto every small defeat...forever.

“God gave us memory so that we might have roses in December.”

"I love Valentine's Day. When you're a kid everyone gets a Valentine. It's like 'TO TIM, NICE PANTS, LOVE SCOTT'." - Mike Birbiglia

I have a confession to make.

Even though I'm single (and have been for 26 out of the past 27 Valentines days)...

I like Valentines day.

No, not the commercialized, forced affection part of Valentines day but I do appreciate any opportunity to give gifts, tell people you love them and make them smile. Perhaps the reason I can appreciate this 'holiday' (without being bitter) is because I don't believe that it should be limited to celebrating romantic love. I believe Valentines day can, just as easily, be used to celebrate love for your family or your friends either in addition too or instead of celebrating romantic love.

For as long as I can remember I would wake on on Valentines day to find a special treat from my parents. Sometimes it was chocolates, sometimes a special cookie, one year it was a heart shaped coin purse and every now and then it was just a card. Regardless of what the gift was, it was a reminder of love - my parents love for me as well as the possibility that love, true and romantic love, was out there somewhere.

So, here's hoping that Valentines day brought you some love - love from your family, your friends, your pets, your coworkers...whomever.

“Life is partly what we make it, and partly what it is made by the friends we choose.” -Tennessee Williams

I am incredibly lucky. I have had the same amazing best friend since I was in grade 8. I spent the afternoon with her today and I realized that the very best part of our friendship is that she makes me feel that I am the best possible version of myself. I don't have to pretend to be cooler than I am, or smarter than I am or funnier than I am...when I am with her I am the perfect amount of cool, smart, funny etc. I hope that I make her feel the same way.

In my life, this level of comfort and security has been something that I have found difficult to achieve with people outside of my family. My immediate family know pretty much ever facet of who I am and, they too, make me feel as if I am a perfect version of myself.

Someday I hope to find this quality in a mate...a man who makes me feel as if I am the perfect version of me. Who doesn't want to change where I came from, how I look, what I value or the things and people that I love. I do believe that the person you are with should challenge you to try new things and consider new ideas...but I don't want to feel as if I am a square peg trying to fit into a round hole just so I don't have to be alone.

And so...I continue to wait...

“If you blame others for your failures, do you credit them with your success?”

Blame: The state of being responsible for a fault or error; culpability.

Responsibility: Something for which one is responsible; a duty, obligation, or burden.

Not every workplace is ideal. Responsibilities are not always well defined therefore...sometimes things fall through the cracks. Tasks don't get done or they are done incorrectly - it happens, we're human. However, what bothers me the most is when no one takes ownership for their mistakes. When I say "ownership" I don't necessarily mean "oops, I messed up, I'm sorry" (although that is nice). What I mean is - seeing a problem -> looking for a solution -> putting the solution into practice. Often, instead of ownership, people just pass the buck...they don't want to make the tough decision or have the awkward conversation...instead they want to "think about it".

I know that I am new to the corporate world and it is easy for those on the "outside" to criticize. I admit that I don't have to concern myself with the bottom line, answer to the owners or reach a sales goal. I am only accountable for my small list of responsibilities however my pay scale and benefits reflect that level of responsibility. However, sadly, the people on the "outside", the people with that level of responsibility and corresponding pay scale, are the ones who have to deal with the day to day challenges which arise out of the indecisiveness.

In the end, I suppose it is just one of life's little frustrations.

“If there were no God, it would have been necessary to invent him.” -Voltaire

"I know that you don't believe in God or the power of prayer. And that's okay. To each his own. But you've go to believe in something. Something more than you can touch taste or see. Because life is too hard to go through it alone. Without something to hold onto and without something that's sacred."

A while back I had a discussion with a friend about religious beliefs. During our conversation this person revealed to me that they are an atheist and that really made me think. Atheism is a concept that I just can't wrap my brain around. I understand people believing different gods or multiple gods or "the universe" but I can't figure out how someone can go through life without believing in anything at all. Do these people believe that everything that happens to them everyday is a completely random occurrence with no rhyme or reason? I feel like too many awful and wonderful things happen every day for there not to be some sort of cosmic plan. However, to be fair, I have had of wonderful things in m life so perhaps that is why it is so easy for me to have faith in "the plan".

Although...perhaps if you believe in something less ethereal like you family and your friends you won't spend your life trying to appease your god or gods. Perhaps the atheists have it right and instead of focusing on trying to please the big guy in the sky we should focus on trying to please the old woman beside us on the bus or the young man bagging our groceries.

Personally, I think that I will always believe in the big guy in the sky and not just because of the blessings he has given me. I believe in him because in order to live my life I need to know that there is a blueprint, a master plan. To those that don't need that comfort and safety I give my kudos...I am not brave enough to go it alone.

“Feeling gratitude and not expressing it is like wrapping a present and not giving it.”

Recently I have found myself randomly thanking the universe for things.

"Dear Parking Spot,

Thank you for showing up just when I needed you.

Love, Emily"

I'm not sure where this practice originated but by releasing these thoughts into the universe I like to think that I'm contributing a little bit of positivity and light. Perhaps by thanking the universe for these daily miracles it will feel refreshed and rejuvenated and inspired to make more magic happen.

Today I stumbled upon the blog of a woman doing the very same thing! Exciting.

The site is http://www.thxthxthx.com/ and it is delightful! Here are a few of my favorites...

What about DOUBLE rainbows?

I am married to Disney World, but New York is my mistress. She's dirty and I like it!

I wholeheartedly agree.

This happens to me all the time!

My absolute favorite because it is so true! In fact, I just did it.



The air in my apartment doesn't smell like cookies but it does smell like my cinnamon candle. YUM!

As someone who suffers from mild social anxiety this is the BEST feeling in the world!

"I began to believe the fairy tales: You know, how we're all out there looking for our magical missing half. "

Once upon a time there was a little girl who grew up watching Disney movies. Each film reinforced her desire to find her "Prince Charming" and live "happily ever after".

Now that she is grown up she still watches movies, lots of movies... and the movies still have the same message. However, now instead of looking for Prince Charming in a cape or a crown she is looking for her tortured, satirical, music loving, cardigan wearing indie boy.

500 Days of Summer

Nick and Norah's Infinite Playlist

Youth in Revolt

Scott Pilgrim vs. The World

A young, awkward man longing for his quirky, enigmatic soul mate. The setting is different but the story and the characters are the same. How I long to be the slightly pretty and neurotic, cardigan wearing love interest...but I don't think it's meant to be. I didn't fit into the stereotype of the "damsel in distress" or "the princess" and I don't fit into the stereotype of the "pretty, complicated but endearing indie girl" either. I'm too loud, to open, to mainstream to find the indie prince charming I've been searching for. Do I need to change my expectations? Should I just settle for a nice guy who likes me?

Or will someone, someday finally be both the one I want and the one that wants me.

"God dwells within you, as you."

A few years ago I read the book "Eat. Pray. Love." At the time it was a beautiful concept...a woman who leaves everything comfortable and comforting behind to figure out who she is. When I read the book I thought "I want to do that...go away and experience other cultures...really find out who I am." Today I saw the film and I finallyl realized how sad this woman's life was...she had NO idea who she was. She had been in relationships since she was 15 years old and she never had time to figure out who she was, what she loved and where she was going. All her life she did what was expected of her- school, career, marriage, buying a house, having a child.

How awful would it be to know that there was nothing in the world that you genuinely cared about? Not people, or your job, or a hobby. She was just a mirror...instead of being her own person merely she reflected the love and passions of her friends, family and lovers. And even worse, she was totally aware of her absence of interests, faith and passion.

I could never, ever exist knowing that there was nothing unique about me.

Living the life of a chameleon...changing your colours to suit your surroundings. Sure, I think everyone does that to an extent, especially during high school and university. For heaven sakes I used to listen to Operation Ivy and wore studded bracelets that I bought at Claire's to impress a boy I liked...but eventually I understood...that wasn't for me (and neither was the boy).

I suppose everyone needs a time in their live where they can figure out exactly who they are. But...I can't even imagine how difficult it would be to start from scratch.

"Dreams feel real while we're in them. It's only when we wake up that we realize something was actually strange."

I fully intended to write about "Inception" tonight when I got home from the movie theatre. Not a review, necessarily, but my thoughts and opinions on what that has been heralded as one of the greatest films of the decade.

However...

I am fairly sure that if I attempt to delve into the layers of that film my brain will self-destruct. Even as I write these words, smoke is pouring out of my ears as a result of my brain attempting to process the information it has just been fed.

Therefore, instead of writing, I will sleep....perchance to dream.

"Love is just a word until someone comes along and gives it meaning.”

I believe that you do not choose who you fall in love with.

I also believe that two consenting adults who are in love should be able to share their lives, forever, no matter their race, sex, religion or creed.


In July of 2005 Canada legalized same-sex marriage. Our country served as a haven for couples in love who were not able to be married in their own counties, state or cities. I am proud to live in a country that recognizes the rights of people regardless of their sexual orientation. People are people.


Today, Proposition 8 was overturned, legalizing same sex marriage in California...
in this I see progress, hope and, above all, love for our fellow man.


"God doesn't make mistakes. People are born how they are born. And I think people should be able to get married and love each other."

~Kristin Chenoweth

"Thoughtcrime does not entail death: thoughtcrime is death."

Does anyone else think that "geolocation" is actually a really bad idea?

What is geolocation, you ask? Well, according to wikipedia (an always reliable source) geolocation is the identification of the real-world geographic location of an object, such as a cell phone or an Internet-connected computer terminal.

A more specific example of geolocation would be "foursquare"...what is "foursquare", you ask? Back to wikipedia for this little nugget.."Foursquare is a location-based social networking website, software for mobile devices, and also a game. Users "check-in" at venues using a mobile website, text messaging or a device-specific application. They are then awarded points and sometimes badges."

Aside from the fact that the foursquare notices which clutter up my news feed are INCREDIBLY annoying I also think that it is dangerous and a tad narcissistic. First of all , if you are in a coffee shop in the distillery district...that means I can break into your house and steal your shit, right?


And secondly, despite what you may think, I do not need/want to know where you are at all times. And even less, I do not want updates sent to me every five minutes outlining this fact. It makes me feel as if I am indirectly stalking you and I don't like that feeling.

Maybe it's just me but, in an age where parents preach constant vigilance to their wee ones and change passwords weekly to protect their identities, doesn't it seem counter intuitive to advertise your location every minute of the day?

"...but when defining Canada don't forget to mention that we have set sparks..."

The first time I heard Shane Koyczan I was rendered speechless...and that is hard to do.

I know that I am more than a little bit behind in writing about Shane Koyczan, one of the greatest Canadian talents of our time. Shane performed an extremely moving, funny and telling tribute to our country at the Opening Ceremonies of the 2010 Vancouver Games. His poem, "we are more" is a great inspiration to anyone who has ever worked abroad and had to defend their country to ignorant foreigners.

Thanks to a dear friend at work, my eyes were opened to this incredible artist, speaker, writer and poet and the voice of not only our nation, but also the voice of my generation. He speaks with truth, humour and bravery in a way that can move you to tears, to laughter or to action.

Please enjoy the text from "We Are More" below but I urge you to watch Shane recite his poetry via youtube or itunes to understand the full experience.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8BIr9oSK53E&NR=1

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=91CyZqlfQ7Y&feature=related (featuring Dan Mangan, who I love!)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6VrZE8MCnIA&feature=related

We Are More
by Shane Koyczan

When defining Canada
you might list some statistics
you might mention our tallest building
or biggest lake
you might shake a tree in the fall
and call a red leaf Canada
you might rattle off some celebrities
might mention Buffy Sainte-Marie
might even mention the fact that we've got a few
Barenaked Ladies
or that we made these crazy things
like zippers
electric cars
and washing machines
when defining Canada
it seems the world's anthem has been
"been there done that"
and maybe that's where we used to be at
it's true
we've done and we've been
we've seen
all the great themes get swallowed up by the machine
and turned into theme parks
but when defining Canada
don't forget to mention that we have set sparks
we are not just fishing stories
about the one that got away
we do more than sit around and say "eh?"
and yes
we are the home of the Rocket and the Great One
who inspired little number nines
and little number ninety-nines
but we're more than just hockey and fishing lines
off of the rocky coast of the Maritimes
and some say what defines us
is something as simple as please and thank you
and as for you're welcome
well we say that too
but we are more
than genteel or civilized
we are an idea in the process
of being realized
we are young
we are cultures strung together
then woven into a tapestry
and the design
is what makes us more
than the sum total of our history
we are an experiment going right for a change
with influences that range from a to zed
and yes we say zed instead of zee
we are the colours of Chinatown and the coffee of Little Italy
we dream so big that there are those
who would call our ambition an industry
because we are more than sticky maple syrup and clean snow
we do more than grow wheat and brew beer
we are vineyards of good year after good year
we reforest what we clear
because we believe in generations beyond our own
knowing now that so many of us
have grown past what used to be
we can stand here today
filled with all the hope people have
when they say things like "someday"
someday we'll be great
someday we'll be this
or that
someday we'll be at a point
when someday was yesterday
and all of our aspirations will pay the way
for those who on that day
look towards tomorrow
and still they say someday
we will reach the goals we set
and we will get interest on our inspiration
because we are more than a nation of whale watchers and lumberjacks
more than backpacks and hiking trails
we are hammers and nails building bridges
towards those who are willing to walk across
we are the lost-and-found for all those who might find themselves at a loss
we are not the see-through gloss or glamour
of those who clamour for the failings of others
we are fathers brothers sisters and mothers
uncles and nephews aunts and nieces
we are cousins
we are found missing puzzle pieces
we are families with room at the table for newcomers
we are more than summers and winters
more than on and off seasons
we are the reasons people have for wanting to stay
because we are more than what we say or do
we live to get past what we go through
and learn who we are
we are students
students who study the studiousness of studying
so we know what as well as why
we don't have all the answers
but we try
and the effort is what makes us more
we don't all know what it is in life we're looking for
so keep exploring
go far and wide
or go inside but go deep
go deep
as if James Cameron was filming a sequel to The Abyss
and suddenly there was this location scout
trying to figure some way out
to get inside you
because you've been through hell and high water
and you went deep
keep exploring
because we are more
than a laundry list of things to do and places to see
we are more than hills to ski
or countryside ponds to skate
we are the abandoned hesitation of all those who can't wait
we are first-rate greasy-spoon diners and healthy-living cafes
a country that is all the ways you choose to live
a land that can give you variety
because we are choices
we are millions upon millions of voices shouting
"keep exploring... we are more"
we are the surprise the world has in store for you
it's true
Canada is the "what" in "what's new?"
so don't say "been there done that"
unless you've sat on the sidewalk
while chalk artists draw still lifes
on the concrete of a kid in the street
beatboxing to Neil Young for fun
don't say you've been there done that
unless you've been here doing it
let this country be your first-aid kit
for all the times you get sick of the same old same old
let us be the story told to your friends
and when that story ends
leave chapters for the next time you'll come back
next time pack for all the things
you didn't pack for the first time
but don't let your luggage define your travels
each life unravels differently
and experiences are what make up
the colours of our tapestry
we are the true north
strong and free
and what's more
is that we didn't just say it
we made it be.

"Of all mindfulness meditations, that on death is supreme."

The next time you have to do an unpleasant task, consider the option of not being able to do it because you are no longer living. Taking out the garbage. Doing your taxes. Walking the dog. I suppose this way of thinking could be beneficial for a while but eventually would it lose its impact? Would you become complacent with the concept of death? I think that the consideration of death is an important, although admittedly morbid, practice. I wouldn't say that it is something that I think about often but every now and then a thought pops into my head...."someday I will cease to be..."

People have very different ways of dealing with the death while trying to live their lives - some people become obsessed while others ignore the inevitable completely. In "The Happiness Project" (I know, I know - enough with that book already!) the author examines her mortality by reading "memoirs of a catastrophe"; books based on the pain and suffering that others have survived. By doing so, the author found herself with a heightened appreciation for her "ordinary existence" as well as a "new and intense appreciation for her obedient body."

I find a similar type of peace in hearing stories of others suffering...how lucky am I to be a free, healthy, intelligent woman living in this era, this country, this city? As I said, I am not one to dwell on the negative or obsess over death, but I do think it is important to put ourselves in situations that remind us of how lucky we are to be alive.

"Remember, friends, as you pass by,

As you are now so once was I.

As I am now, so you must be.

Prepare yourself to follow me."

"Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.”

I have always worried that the contributions that I make to the world may not be enough.

I didn't donate enough money...

enough thought...

enough effort...

enough time...

Is the job that I am doing making a positive contribution to the universe? How am I helping the victims of an earthquake halfway around the world by planning parties in Canada?

What is the legacy that I am leaving?

When I was in therapy I would voice these concerns to my therapist, her response was that I was comparing apples to oranges...it is impossible fix all of the problems of the world. You can only do what you can do. Last night I found a similar message in "The Happiness Project".

"We expect heroic virtue to look flashy -- moving to Uganda to work with Aids victims, perhaps, or documenting the plight of the homeless people in Detroit. (Saint) Therese's examples shows that ordinary life, too, is full of opportunities for worth, if inconspicuous, virtue."

Never underestimate the contribution that you are making to the universe. And don't let anyone else devalue your contribution. Whether you are doing something small like helping to plan a fundraiser, donating $10 to a charity or volunteering or something big like dedicating your life to a not-for-profit organization or working in a research lab on the cure for cancer...every little bit helps.

"It is more fitting for a man to laugh at life than to lament over it."

So, I guess Toronto isn't as cold and heartless as everyone thought.

No, Toronto has feelings and they can be hurt just like any other cities feelings can be hurt.

Wait a second...can a cities feelings be hurt? That doesn't seem right...

The Niagara Parks commission recently launched an ad campaign that was ever so slightly disparaging to Toronto and the Torontonian way of life.

*GASP!*

How dare anyone insult Toronto with it's diverse neighbourhoods, cultural festivals, delicious restaurants, burning police cards, stunning smog-filled vistas and insane traffic jams.

Oh...wait...some of those weren't good, were they?

Now before you jump down my throat I want to make something VERY clear...I LOVE Toronto. My best friend lives just off the Danforth and I have another close friend lives who lives off Queen West. Toronto is amazing. There is great shopping, fabulous concerts, inspiring theatre, great restaurants, stunning museums and delightful neighbourhoods. However, I think it is quite narrow minded and humourless of Torontonians to be so offended by an ad campaign which pokes fun at some of the less glamours aspects of city life.

An article by John Semley of the Torontoist claims that the campaign "prove(s) that Niagara can’t sell itself without digging on some cartoonish idea of Toronto. " Really? You can't just look at yourself and see a tiny bit of truth in these advertisements? Sure, not ever alleyway in Toronto is filled graffiti and vandalism but not every street you take in Niagara leads to a winery...only, like, 75% of them do.

Semley also states that "there’s more to Niagara than sipping wine amidst a bunch of trees, riding rented mountain bikes through largely unexciting trails, and trying to snap a family photo in front of the Falls while being hassled by a human being in an anthropomorphized Hershey’s Kiss costume", pretending as if Tourism Toronto does not do the exact same thing in their advertising campaigns by capitalizing on recognizable attractions such as the CN Tower, the Rogers Center and the Toronto Harbourfront. Of course the NIAGARA PARKS COMMISSION is focusing on specific, iconic locations....THOSE ARE THE LOCATIONS THAT THEY REPRESENT!

However, having said that, I do not appreciate being painted with the same brush as Niagara Falls. I work in stunning winery in Niagara on the Lake which is committed to premium wine making, responsible stewardship of the land and innovative design-not comparable with Clifton Hill. Much of our clientele (be it tours, licensees, corporate events or wine sales) originate in Toronto so why would it benefit us to "hurt the feelings" of those that are fans of our wines?

However, it's not all bad news, Marcus Gee of the Globe and Mail wrote "it would be nice if we could grow out of all that adolescent angst. Confident cities don’t throw a fit when some regional tourism group dares to imply they are less than perfect. Confident cities know in their bones that the strains of city life are more than outweighed by the rich variety of experience that big cities offer. As one Web commentator put it, “get over yourself,” Toronto."

Well said, sir.

I just think that the Torontonians offended by this campaign need to sit back and relax.

Maybe they're stressed by all the crime and graffiti...come to Niagara and have a glass of wine.

It's on us.

The Torontoist Article-http://torontoist.com/2010/07/come_to_niagara_try_the_whine.php

The Globe and Mail Article-http://www.theglobeandmail.com/news/national/toronto/marcus-gee/thin-skinned-toronto-let-niagara-get-its-goat/article1647894/

"Times fun when you're having flies.” -Kermit the Frog

Speaking of embracing our childishness...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B7UmUX68KtE

“Being happy doesn't mean that everything is perfect. It means that you've decided to look beyond the imperfections.”

So, right now I am reading a fabulous book called "The Happiness Project". The book is based on the journey of a woman who spent a year "test-driving the wisdom of the ages, the current scientific studies, and the lessons from popular culture about how to be happy--from Aristotle to Martin Seligman to Thoreau to Oprah."

Basically, the author gave herself large goals each month for instance, one month was "Aim Higher" which was her goal related to her improving her career. Within that goal, she then breaks it down into more specific, measurable actions, i.e. launch a blog. (http://www.happiness-project.com/).

Currently I am about half way through the book so I can't give you a full review however, last night, in the chapter dedicated to "being serious about play" I came across an inspirational quote and concept that THRILLED ME!

In the chapter that discussed "being serious about play" the authors tasks included "finding more fun, taking time to be silly, going off the path and starting a collection." Within the "finding more fun" task the author very seriously considered the question "What is fun?" What is fun for me is not necessarily fun for my partner, family or friends, right? After some intense soul-searching, the author decided that what she most enjoyed, what made her happiest and what she considered to be 'fun' was reading "KidLit". Therefore, in a stroke of absolute brilliance the author decided to start a "KidLit" book club.

I am often embarrassed by my love of more childish things (i.e. Harry Potter, Disney etc.) and I spend a lot of time justifying my appreciation for them. When the author started her "KidLit" book club, she sent out an e-mail containing this quote;

"When I was ten, I read fairy tales in secret and would have been ashamed

if I had been found doing so. Now that I am fifty, I read them openly.

When I became a man I put away childish things, including the fear of

childishness and the desire to be very grown up."

-C.S. Lewis

HOW BRILLIANT IS THIS CONCEPT?

Many people spend their childhood wanting to be a "grown up", wanting freedom and respect.

I was never one of those children.

I never hid my love for "play" and my "passion for the pretend"...so why start now?

“Why is it that hate comes out so easily, yet...love? It gets trapped inside.”

I think I may use the word "hate" too often.

It's convienent, the word has all the power of an expletive without all the drama.

I suppose I don't really understand the power behind the sentiment.

I use it to express frustration, anger, hurt and disappointment.

"I hate you."

"I hate her."

"I hate him."

"I hate this."

"Hate: the emotion of intense dislike; a feeling of dislike so strong that it demands action."

Yikes.

When I use the word I certainly do not intend for it to be taken in the true meaning.

For instance:

I hate that my office doesn't have air conditioning.

I hate that my car uses so much gas.

I hate that my internet is so slow.

I hate that I don't have cable.

I hate Miley Cirus.

I hate traffic.

I hate...

Tonight when I used the word "hate" in reference to a person I really don't care for.

In response,the person I was speaking with said "I don't hate anyone..."

I was shocked.

"You don't hate anyone? What about Hitler?"

His extremely insightful (albeit, out of character) response was:

"Hate is what made Hitler who he was."

Oh.

Wow.

I wish I could say something warm and fuzzy here like:

"let's take all of the hate in the world and replace it with love"

but that's extremely unrealistic.

However, perhaps the first step is restricting the use of the word "hate" in our vocabulary.

Thoughts?